Yesterday marked a milestone for me. It was simultaneously disturbing but very fulfilling. As a result of my previous day’s blog post at http://vigaland.blogspot.ca/2012/08/incest-that-could-never-happen-in-my.html , I was contacted by not one, but two men who were sexually abused as youngsters. This brings to 3 the number of men who have shared their story of abuse with me. I feel so honored to have their trust and support for what I am trying to do. Thank you gentlemen. You know who you are.
One of these men was incredibly brave. He wrote his story on my personal Facebook page in full detail. I cried as I read it. His sordid tale came straight from his heart. What had I unleashed? But it was good. He is now one of the members of my FACEBOOK community group, OUT FROM UNDER, and has kindly given me permission to copy/paste his story here. I have copied and pasted it just as he wrote it, full of emotion and heartache. I can sense his desperate need to be heard, to tell others what happened to him and his relatives too. It may be a little hard to follow, but you will get the gist of it … and it’s not pretty. But it is all real.
This gentleman is the first of the members of either sex of OUT FROM UNDER at FACEBOOK to speak publicly. I applaud his courage and thank him so much for sharing his story. Here’s what David wrote:
“Viga,,please as I share,,forgive me,,thanks,where I was sent,,as a child,,it was later called ” The Doherty Farm of Horrors,,”outside of Portage la Prairie Manitoba,,he was I guess a step father,,he never adopted me,,thank God,,he abused all of us,,me,,his daughters,,and 4 boys,,he beat mother,,into I guess getting his way,,she closed her eyes as he did it to us,,we did sex acts for him,,yes even us boys,,ok,,in the mouth,,etc,,he made older girl pregnant,she ,had daughter of incest,,Helen,,he did sex abuse,,he did beatings,,verbally he was bad,,for example as I was not his kid,,his name for me,,was,,The BASTARD,,ok,,,he did emmotional abuse,,to all,,mentally he had us,,we were wrecks,,his like puppets,,,,,,Viga,,later when many of us went to Child family Services for help,,we were told we made it up,,as some of us left,,I ran away 29 times,,what I and other kids told he did,,we were told kids should listen to the parents,,and not lie,,make stuff up,,in 1995 Aug there was a murder on that farm,,I testified against the bad man,,Earl Doherty.and Earls son,,Clarence Doherty,,a 8 year old boy was hiton head and killed on that farm,,.can you believe it ,,he got off,,,anyways,,many of us,,esp me,,charged him,Earl Doherty,,,RCMP said he was too old,,only get house arrest,,so no justice,,I am post traumatic stress dis orders leading to severe bouts of anxiety and depressions,,I am called,,Multiple personality dis orders,,I am called also by Doctors,,Bi polar,I am dis assocaiative,,??,,I drank,,drugged to forget all my life,,I gave up booze,,Drugs Jan 10 ,1996,after I cut my both arms to the bone,,close to the elbows,,deeps,,and I stabbed my leg,,I was sick an tired of the flash backs,,memmories,,and booze ,,drugs were no longer killing it in my head,,I was sick an tired,,wanted it to end,,as the murder had just happened,,more talk,,more publicity,,so,,,,Viga,,I read really fast,,I have many children in me,,little ones,,ok,,,I love your post,,I loved the videio that girl spoke on and did,,folks want to write about me,,I get scared,,the devil,,bad man,,Earl Doherty died,,my so called mother died,,we,,the brothers,,if thats what you call us,,Clarence,,charged with murder,aug,,1995,Gary,,on skid ,gary is lost,,hopeless,,i find him once a yr,,in Vancouver,,,alvin,,a loner,,divorced,,Brian,,he is totaly goofed up,,he did time in juvenile place,,one girl,,Faye,,went to a woman,,fell in love,,got married,Faye and I visit,,we do not much talk about it,,,Daughter of incest Helen,,hiding out sort of on a rez in Manitoba,,we all rarely communicate,,scared,,embarrased I guess,,???We,,yes all of us divorced ,,some a couple of times,,where was God,,where was my Mohter,,why did no one help us,,no one cared,,every one took us back there,,I am alright,,today,,got lots,,lots of help,,head shrinks,,doctors,,counsellors,,many peoples helped me,,mentally,,but,,,some times it just grabs me,,a living hell,,even today,,Thanks for listening,,I send you a jentle respectful hug,,Viga,,just because I am supposed to”
After reading David’s story, I did some research on male victims of sexual abuse and found THIS ARTICLE which I have added to my information site at VIGALAND. It is so in line with some of what David has shared above. Do have a read, and while you’re over at VIGALAND’S INFORMATION ARTICLE SITE, check out some of the other articles I’ve posted there. All worthwhile reading for anyone interested in or affected by abuse of any kind.
Have a great weekend everyone. May the sun shine in on your day and chase the heartaches away …